I learned how to eat in a way that was better for my body, and my symptoms improved. Yet, I would get super upset with myself if I strayed from the diet. I was still telling myself the story that my body wasn't good enough. I didn't really understand the value of rest and self-care. I was doing healthy things, but I wasn't really experiencing wellness yet.
One day while I was sitting on my yoga mat journaling, I realized that I had been carrying around an overwhelming amount of negativity and fear related to my body. Tears began rolling down my face as I began to understand how weighed down I was by these underlying feelings. The discovery hit me...in order to truly heal and experience wellness, I had to love my body. No more telling myself that my body was broken. The new story was this: my body has the ability to heal itself if I allow it.
Wellness is a mindset.
Obsessively calorie-counting and over-exercising are not healthy. In an attempt to create wellness in the body, we can lose sight of creating wellness in our thoughts. A person who is constantly berating herself, telling herself that she's not thin enough, telling herself she's not muscular enough, telling herself she's not pretty enough is not experiencing true wellness. True wellness is holistic. It encompasses the whole life, the whole person--mind, body, and soul. It is an adventure of seeking balance and what feels good for your life. It is not a pinnacle of perfection.
I believe that mindset is the beginning--the spark--of wellness creation. We must begin with a mindset of love and the belief that our bodies have the ability to experience complete health. We won't get there by hating ourselves.
I am still in the process of learning to take a nap when I feel tired (rather than overloading my body with caffeine), to exercise to feel good (not because I’m afraid of what will happen if I don’t), to eat foods that will nourish my healing process (but not beat myself up if I eat something that doesn’t fit the plan). I am starting to catch myself when I am going down a negative spiral of thoughts. I feel empowered knowing that I can change my outlook.
We cannot get to a place of feeling lighter, heathier, and happier by putting ourselves down and stressing over every little thing. We can, however, start with loving thoughts and watch as our healing ensues.